The Next Chapter

After months of applying for jobs, I can officially say that I have a job. For the past month, I have gone through a few rounds of interviews for this position in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints' (LDS) Family History Department. My first interview was a month ago. I flew up there and stayed the night with Renee and her husband and had a good interview, which admittedly I was nervous for. But they saw something they liked and the next day, I was called and invited back for a second interview. This second round was kind of a little chaotic as I flew in the morning of and was back to California that afternoon. Again, I felt that I had done well, but I kept the attitude that anything could happen. This interview was on a Friday. That Monday, much to my surprise and delight, I was called and asked to come back for a third and final interview that Thursday. After these interviews, I was called the next day and officially offered the job. I signed my offer letter and will start my new job this coming Monday.

But things have worked out so well for me that it kind of scares me. I found a place to live quickly and just feel that this is so meant to be. But sometimes I feel when things work out like this for me that something bad is suppose to happen. However, pushing these fears aside, I am concentrating on the joy of having a new job with good pay and good benefits. Plus, one of the best benefits is that I will be living close to my sister, who is my best friend. She is awesome and I am so excited that we can be living in the same city again. So wish me luck.

Also, I want to thank everyone for their love, support, and prayers!

Picture update....

The following are some highlights from my summer since I returned home to California. One of my favorite things to do is to go swimming with my nephews, especially Eli. Nathan and Laurel are teaching him how to swim without wearing his life vest. He is learning quickly. Also, my dad and Nathan have been having Eli jump off the rocks by our pool and the diving board into the pool. For some reason, Eli refuses to go down the slide. But he likes to jump off the diving board or the side of the pool into my dad's arms. Also, we celebrated my mom's 55th birthday. Below, you will see her with her favorite gift courtesy of my sister, Renee. When she saw it in Target, she was like I have to give this to mom.

Nathan readying Eli to jump into my dad's arms.

Nathan and Eli. I think Nathan may have been trying to convince Eli to go off the slide and he is refusing.

Eli preparing to jump off the rocks.

And he does it!!!

West and I chilling. He is so cute! I love having him give me high-fives or doing "jumpy-jumpies" with him.

My mom before opening Renee's special gift.

Yes, your eyes are not deceiving you. That is a huge bin of cheese balls. My mom loves them.

For Uncle Lewis...

Today, when I was babysitting my nephews, I asked Eli if he wanted to write a letter to his Aunt Renee and Uncle Lewis. He said he wanted too. However, we never got to the letter part because Eli decided he wanted to draw pictures of Renee and Lewis. So he decided to begin with Uncle Lewis and he ended with Uncle Lewis. I am sorry Aunt Renee, but your picture never got made. But I loved the portraits he made of Lewis. They are so awesome. Eli did a wonderful job and he signed all of his pictures.

Forgiveness

After meeting with a member of my Bishopric today, I have reflected a lot on forgiveness. This man, who is one of the most truly amazing people I know, and I started to discuss forgiveness after a question he asked me regarding family, specifically how my relationships were with my family members. I told him I was struggling, and this is a constant struggle and trial for me, I will freely admit that, as I know the Lord is trying to teach me something, with forgiving others. I have forgiven and forgotten, but I told him I was still struggling with forgiveness because I was tired of forgiving the same people over and over again. I hate that they feel like they can continue to hurt me because I will just automatically forgive them. The Lord commands that we forgive all. I think some of my struggle persists because I am tired of these people hurting me. Just stop!!!

However, I think I have found part of what I need to learn from this trial, I have learned that you can forgive and move on. The people you forgive no longer have to be part of your life because forgiveness does not automatically lead to a renewal of the relationship. Instead, forgiveness allows you to move forward and not backwards. You do not have to go back because I have been burned by going back and I hated the direction I was going. I am still struggling with some of the anger but I am at peace knowing that I am ridding of relationships that are not good for me. The sad part about this all, is that some of these people are family. But in reality, I really do not want them as my family. That is the other lesson I have learned on this journey of forgiveness. Just because you have biological ties, does not mean they are family. I have had some family just do awful things not only me, but to my mom and sister. We are so naturally inclined to forgive and just fall back into these old patterns, where it always ends the same way, we get hurt. And we just continue in this cycle, but I do not want to hurt anymore. I do not want to suffer at their hands. I have had enough. I am trying to break this cycle.

You see the wonderful thing about forgiveness, is that is allows us to move forward. To let go of the hurt and the pain. I am not one hundred percent at this stage yet, but I feel I have taken steps to get here. I have re prioritized how I want in my life as this is what two years living 3,000 miles away allows you to do. I pray every day that I can continue to move forward and just wash away these unhealthy relationships. I know I will have my down days, but I feel that if I just keep walking towards the light, towards God that I will be fine. That I can forgive, forget and move forward. I can move forward knowing exactly what I want in my life because I know exactly what I want. The counselor I spoke to agreed with me and urged me to continue moving forward.

Gotta love Noodles!

Before leaving Boston, my friend Betsy was telling me how this big yellow noodle just showed up by her work place on day. She thought it somehow might be related to Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. So when Renee came out here, Renee, Betsy, and I went to check out the noodle and found it out is part of this promotion Kraft is putting on this summer called "You Know You Love it." So doing what anybody does, we all took our pictures with it.

The noodle.

Renee and the noodle.

Me and the noodle.

Update!

I thought I would give an update on the happenings of my life. I have decided to leave Boston in favor of California. After spending much of June contemplating my future and where I would like to work, I decided I wanted to work in California and the only way to get employers to take a serious look at my resume was to actually live in the state. So in a a week and a half I will be on my way back to California. I am taking this huge leap of faith, but I know it is the right decision. Plus, I have really struggled lately with living so far from my family. I miss them! I want to be nearer to them. I hate the distance. I really do. In all honesty, I cannot wait to see my nephews. They are so adorable. If two certain individuals play their cards right (i.e. buy me pretty gifts, just kidding), I will babysit every week. I do not even see it as babysitting though because I have so much fun with Eli and West.

While I am excited for this next step and for returning to California, leaving Boston will be hard. Though I will not miss the winters or the humidity, I will miss the friends I have out here. I know we will always be in touch and visit each other, but I have no idea how to say good bye. I have the most amazing friends out here. I really do. I could write forever about how fantastic they are and what an impact they have had and will continue to have on me. They have all made me a better person. I will be a sobbing mess by next weekend. I think this is part of the reason why I wanted to have Renee come out here and drive back with me. She knows me better than I know myself. She will listen to the tears or see if I am fighting some emotion, will make it come out.

So Renee and I will drive back across the country. I am just excited that we get to go through Scranton, Pennsylvania.

Miracles really do occur...

This past week, I returned to California for a visit. It was so much fun! Renee and Lewis also came and we all stayed at Hotel La Lakey (or my parents house). As part of this vacation, Renee and Lewis said they would clean out my parents' garage. I do not know how many of you have ever seen or been in my their garage, but it is kind of gross. It was overcrowded with boxes. As three cats resided in there, there is cat hair and cat pee everywhere. Basically, you never wanted to go out there. So this past Friday, Renee, Lewis, and I and later my parents joined in, cleaned it up. We took three truckloads of stuff to DI and hosed everything down. I wish I would have taken a before picture, but here are some after pics! Yes, miracles do occur because who thought it would look this nice. Lewis and Renee and are awesome because it would not have been done without them. Also, we all got out tans from being out in the sun going through boxes and not from laying out by the pool.

This space was filled with boxes and now it is empty.

My sister and mom watching my dad rearrange boxes.

The final product.

Now, I know Nathan and Laurel are probably so sad this missed out on this fun! But do not fret because the next project is shifting through Christmas decorations and lights during Thanksgiving!